Forgiveness: My Burden Was Made Light

Enjoy, friends. I know I did.

perspective

I woke up this morning and did the following:

changed the baby, fed the baby, bathed the baby

thought about reading my scriptures

broke up a fight instead

fed the rest of the kids

cleaned up the mess

twice.

dressed everybody

put two kids in time out

"encouraged" everybody to do their chores

three hundred times over

lost my temper

apologized

thought about exercising

folded laundry instead

fed myself

didn't dress myself or take a shower

sat down to work on a project

just in time for the baby to wake up

changed the baby, fed the baby....

And I thought about something Oliver Wendell Holmes said: "Many people die with their music still in them. Why is this so? Too often it is because they are always getting ready to live. Before they know it, time runs out."

I wonder about this as I see my sketch pad lying empty. And then think to myself.. right now my music is raising my children. I'm not "getting ready to live" as Mr. Holmes said, because I'm too busy in the middle of it!

And I hunger for free time like a starving woman sometimes.. but in the end they need me. Always urgently and always now. So I give.. and another wall in my heart breaks down. And I'm one step closer to my Savior. I suppose this is called "giving yourself to God". And it's what I want. It's just so much harder than I ever thought it would be!